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Arrived.
Made it safely to Sri Lanka. Sent in job application for UN & Yuletide story.
Obviously, have Internet here but only on a really slow computer. No chance to hook up to wireless. Do have air conditioning, though.
Sri Lanka's airport has a BIG sign saying that possessing illegal drugs is punishable by a death sentence. I had to print out the certificate that my sister is going to be cremated.
I'm reciting this poem at her funeral. I still need to write her a letter to be burnt with her. I don't want to; it seems like such a final way of saying goodbye, but it was my idea to do it, just like I'm the one who insisted her ashes should be scattered in Sri Lanka because she needs sunshine, even though I don't believe that she has any awareness left at all to know where her ashes are.
Still, just in case I'm wrong (I don't care about my soul, but I won't have her suffer for my beliefs), would any of you be willing to light a candle or say a prayer during the time of her funeral? If you drop me your timezone, I'll even calculate when it'll be for your time instead of giving the time in Sri Lanka time.
Savior already agreed to. I really would appreciate you performing any sort of ritual that you believe in to let the dead rest peacefully/be reincarnated into a good life since by my beliefs, I am utterly helpless to affect her life at all because she's gone.
I don't think that people in Sri Lanka, or my family, really understand that me being an atheist means I'm hurting in a completely different way to them. I can't take any reassurance in thinking she's gone to a better place or is going to have a better life. All I know is that she's dead and she's gone and everytime I think about in those terms, I feel sick in the pit of my stomach.
That's probably why I'm trying not to think about it too much.
*hugs* Thank you to all of you who are offering me support/memories/condolences, though. I can't reply to things, I know, but I do appreciate the sentiment. A lot.
Obviously, have Internet here but only on a really slow computer. No chance to hook up to wireless. Do have air conditioning, though.
Sri Lanka's airport has a BIG sign saying that possessing illegal drugs is punishable by a death sentence. I had to print out the certificate that my sister is going to be cremated.
I'm reciting this poem at her funeral. I still need to write her a letter to be burnt with her. I don't want to; it seems like such a final way of saying goodbye, but it was my idea to do it, just like I'm the one who insisted her ashes should be scattered in Sri Lanka because she needs sunshine, even though I don't believe that she has any awareness left at all to know where her ashes are.
Still, just in case I'm wrong (I don't care about my soul, but I won't have her suffer for my beliefs), would any of you be willing to light a candle or say a prayer during the time of her funeral? If you drop me your timezone, I'll even calculate when it'll be for your time instead of giving the time in Sri Lanka time.
Savior already agreed to. I really would appreciate you performing any sort of ritual that you believe in to let the dead rest peacefully/be reincarnated into a good life since by my beliefs, I am utterly helpless to affect her life at all because she's gone.
I don't think that people in Sri Lanka, or my family, really understand that me being an atheist means I'm hurting in a completely different way to them. I can't take any reassurance in thinking she's gone to a better place or is going to have a better life. All I know is that she's dead and she's gone and everytime I think about in those terms, I feel sick in the pit of my stomach.
That's probably why I'm trying not to think about it too much.
*hugs* Thank you to all of you who are offering me support/memories/condolences, though. I can't reply to things, I know, but I do appreciate the sentiment. A lot.
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No platitudes or anything from me, D. Just my love and support.
I'm GMT +11 at the moment. I'll light a fire for her down here.
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So you need to light your fire at 9:30PM, today, if possible.
Thank you. ♥
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So you need to light your candle at 5AM, today, if possible. Which seems unlikely, but thank you for offering anyway.
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So you need to light your candle at 5AM, today, if possible. Which seems unlikely, but thank you for offering anyway.
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EST is GMT-5, so you need to light your candle at 6AM, if you can. If you're asleep or get this too late, no worries. I appreciate the offer.
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If you see this before you it's time, if there's anything else you want said or done or incorporated (being agnostic has its perks) don't hesitate. And I'm pretty sure there's enough candles to burn down the city in the basement somewhere, so if you've got a preference to colors/scents, I can try. I'll check back.
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I love you, miss you, and sending you my best <3
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EST is GMT-5, so you need to light your candle at 6AM, if you can. If this reply comes too late, then don't worry about it. Thank you for offering.
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The poem sounds lovely. Remember not to say 'breathe' in between lines. All my love, darling, I can't wait to see you again.
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So, uh, just light it then if you're not on the bus. If you're in Austria, then it's 12:30 noon.
And if you can't, no worries. I love you and thank you for offering.
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*hugs*
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EST is GMT-5, so you need to light your candle at 6AM, if you can. *hugs back* Don't worry if this reply is too late for you to do it; thank you for offering.
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Or, in other words, it's today. *hugs*
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EST is GMT-5, so you need to light your candle at 6AM, if possible. If I answered too late, s'okay. It was good of you to offer.
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EST is GMT-5, so you need to light your candle at 6AM, if you can. Today, not Friday. And thank you.
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If this reply isn't too late, please light your candle at 6AM, if you can.
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...Which means you need to light yours at 3:30AM, if you can. If you can't, it's okay. Thank you for offering.
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That means you need to light a candle at 11:30PM. Thanks, Matt.
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Loving you from here with the candle on standby <3.
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Sri Lanka is UTC/GMT +5:30 hours. The cremation is at 4PM, Sri Lankan time or 11:30AM GMT.
That means you need to light yours at 3:30AM, if you possible. If this reply comes too late, then don't worry about it and thank you for offering.
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Writing a letter doesn't have to be a final good-bye. You can write a series of letters. This is the one that goes with her first, yes, but it by no means has to be the last.
I'll be glad to light a candle if you tell me when. Same as Dani-me, I'm in your time zone in the states (Eastern Standard).
*hugs tightly*
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And since I loved it, I'm giving it to her now. And I want to bleed for my letter to her, but I have nothing really to cut myself with here. Maybe I can use a stapler on my hand to get a few drops.
Sri Lanka is UTC/GMT +5:30 hours. The cremation is at 4PM, Sri Lankan time or 11:30AM GMT.
EST is GMT-5, so you need to light your candle at 6AM if possible.
And thank you for offering to do this.
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Ah! It's 6:20 AM here. I just woke up, but at least I'm close! I didn't get this comment until now. I'll go light the candle right now!
Of course, Fickle. ♥
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*HUGGLES*
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Looks like you're going to have to stay awake and do it at 6AM if you can. And thank you.
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I’m so sorry I’m late about this. Even though I unfortunately think I might have missed the funeral, I lit a candle for a few hours last night. All the lights were off, and it was surprisingly calm and beautiful!
The poem is gorgeous. I hope everything went well, and my family sends you love and their respects. Lots of you to you, Ficky.
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...If that brightens your mood at all. Which I doubt it does because I'm not eloquent at all. But I'm very sorry. I really am. *hugs* And...well, just know I'm thinking of you and stuff.